Various One Line Jokes
AUTHOR: Unknown
PUBLISHED ON: January 11, 2004
DOC SOURCE: http://www.javacasa.com/humor/bible.htm
TAGS: humor

Why was Moses the most wicked man? (He broke all 10 commandments at once.)

What animal could Noah not trust? (The cheetah)

What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark? (Flood lights)

How does a lawyer resemble a rabbi? (Lawyers study the law and the profits)

What are the 2 smallest insects in the Bible? (The widow’s mite(Mark 12:42) and the wicked flea(Proverbs 28:1))

Who was the most ambitious man in the Bible? (Jonah-even a whale coudn’t keep him down)

Who was the first canning factory run by? (Noah-he had a boatful of preserved pairs)

Why was Noah like a hungry cat? (He went 150 days without finding Ararat)

What is it that Adam never saw or had, yet left 2 of them for his children? (Parents)

What Bible character may have only been a foot tall? (Nicodemus-he was a ruler)

What did Jesus have in common with the fish that swallowed Jonah? (Jesus had dinner with a sinner, and the fish had a sinner for dinner)

How do we know Isaiah’s parents were good business people? (They both raised a prophet)

During what season did Eve eat the forbidden fruit? (Early in the fall)

Why couldn’t they play cards on the ark? (Noah was sitting on the deck)

Why did poor Job land in bed with a cold? (He had poor comforters)

How are rollerskates like the fruit in the Garden of Eden? (They come before the fall)

Who introduced salted meat to the Navy? (Noah-he took Ham on the ark)

Who slept five in a bed? (David-he slept with his forefathers)

Why did the people on the ark think the horses were pessimistic? (They kept saying neigh)

How do we know Abraham was smart? (He knew a Lot)

What was one of the first example of math in the Bible? (God told Adam to go forth and mulitply)

Why couldn’t Cain please God with his offering? (He just wasn’t Abel)

How did God keep the oceans clean? (With Tide)

What did Noah say as he was loading the Ark? (“Now I herd everything”)

What did God say when Noah told him he wanted to build the ark out of bricks? (“No, Noah-go for wood”[gopherwood])

What was the name of Isaiah’s horse? (Isme – He said “Whoa, is me!”)

Was Noah the first one out of the Ark? (No, he came forth out of the ark)

Who in the Bible was a very lazy person? (The boy that loafs and fishes)

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